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Coming Home

11/09/2010 by John 2 Comments

I find myself home again after a fall spent traveling to Tuscaloosa, New York City, the Chesapeake Bay, and the Outer Banks. I’m a little road weary and glad to be back in Asheville for a while. So here is something I wrote back in the Spring of 2009 about coming home after a season of adventures.

Photo of the Linville Gorge, North Carolina

The Linville Gorge in the Fall

As the trees opened up at the bend in the trail, the late afternoon sun striking out across the gorge washed the alternating bands of lush vegetation and jagged rock walls before me in a fiery glow that filled my mind and spirit with a profound sense of peace and wonder.

I was home again.

It was the late summer of 2003 at the end of a road trip that had taken me down rivers in the canyons of Utah, hiking in the magnificent forests of the Cascades, and sea kayaking in the salmon and berry filled fiords of southeast Alaska, but at that moment, I realized that nothing I had experienced on that journey had surpassed the beauty I was witnessing out my backdoor on the rim of the Linville Gorge Wilderness in North Carolina.

Growing up as a skateboarding, floppy banged, punk rock aficionado in 1980’s north Alabama, I spent my time waiting for the day I could leave the southeast behind for more majestic and progressive places. I had dreams of attending collage in a ski town out west where I would live in the big mountains and hit the steeps in between classes, but reality and my introverted nature set in and so I remained in the south for my collage years, still dreaming of the time I would escape to more exciting locales. A few twists and turns after college eventually led me to work full time as an instructor for the North Carolina Outward Bound School where I was able to create a lifestyle allowing me to travel and explore new places. My time in that role had me spending warm months hiking and sea kayaking the mountains of western North Carolina and the Outer Banks, then migrating down south during the winter to paddle the Florida Everglades and islands of the Bahamas. It was a grand adventure, allowing me ample time to travel in the time periods between migrations or when I chose to take a season off, as happened that summer of 2003.

Travel is a magical thing. It strips us down to a minimum of our precious possessions and puts us in places where we don’t know what to expect around the next bend or from the next conversation we’re about to have. It allows us a perspective on the places we’ve come from that is far more valuable than what it teaches us about the places we may be visiting at the time. Experiencing the different environments and cultures we travel through shines a light on ourselves, and helps to clarify who we are and what we truly value. When I was younger, I felt that one had to get as far away as possible to experience these things. The moment of clarity I had while looking in awe at the Linville Gorge taught me that adventure, natural wonder, and the insight they imbue can be found right at home.

I now consider myself fortunate to live in the southeast. Here one can explore rugged mountains, beautiful coastlines, and a fascinating cultural and natural history. In these times of economic uncertainty and global warming, what better way to save money, minimize our environmental impacts, and bolster our local economies than to seek our adventures close to home. For me lately, these might simply involve a long run on a local trail or a weekend bike tour. A week away might involve camping and paddling in the coastal areas of the Carolina’s, or a hike on a section of the Appalachian trail. Though the Linville Gorge is no longer my backyard, the Asheville Botanical Gardens are right down the street and the Blue Ridge Parkway is just a 20 minute bike ride away. Natural beauty, adventure, and all the benefits that come along with these phenomenon can be right outside your door if you open yourself up them.

Filed Under: Home, Travel Tagged With: hiking

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

08/15/2010 by John 2 Comments

Fourteen years ago as an Outward Bound semester student, I laid down my sleeping pad on a porch in the Costa Rican highlands with the stars shining above and the lights of homesteads and towns in the valley below. The crisp air carried a light breeze and I was overwhelmed with the feeling of total freedom. At that moment, I felt the freedom to do anything I wanted to do. My entire life could be placed on my back and transported anywhere I wanted to go. All the essentials could fit in my pack; clothing for both hot and cold weather, the implements to prepare and eat a good meal, a warm, dry place to sleep that could be constructed at a moments notice, and light to guide me in the dark. There was something so sublime in this feeling of freedom of movement and possibility. As I sat looking out across the valleys below, I felt I needed very little else but the sense of freedom welling up inside me and the small amount of materials I had in my possession. Since that moment during those times in my life when I have felt weighed down by the responsibilities that come along with day to day living, I have thought of and longed for the feeling I had on that porch under the spreading expanse of space in the Costa Rican sky.

picture of our dining room

So how did I get from there to here, a man with all he needed in a backpack, to being a homeowner, to becoming one questioning whether or not he needs to be a homeowner? The best answer I can think of is that life just happens sometimes. After a decade of living with my partner Mary at various Outward Bound base camps and a few other far flung locations briefly, we decided to do what most people in the United States do. We gathered up our meager savings and finally cleaned all of our accumulated possessions out of our friends and parents basements and garages and bought a house. It has been an adventure in and of itself as all homeowners know and it has given us great joy to make the place into our home, redoing the kitchen and bathroom and painting the interior rooms multiple times (unfortunately still not to our liking). It has been wonderful to have a place to create our lives in, but yet something feels missing and I think it must be that sense of freedom first experienced on that night so long ago.

As I sit in my living room surrounded by the things that have come into my life over the last 40 years, I just feel heavy. I know at one point in my life most of this stuff either brought me some sense of satisfaction or served some useful purpose but at this point, most of it just takes up space and requires me to dust it off occasionally. A house often seems like a magnet that attracts an ever greater quantity of things no matter how hard one tries to fight this seeming law of nature.  And to what end? The more stuff I have, the more resources are required to deal with it all and the less freedom I feel like I have.

More troubling than the stuff problem is the ever growing to do list. I look at my to do list and it is overflowing with the projects I should be doing to maintain our home and I just don’t want to spend my free time doing them. I would much rather go for a long run in the mountains or hang out with friends and family than spend my day power washing and sealing the deck. And although the bank account looks pretty good right now, I know that the next plumbing repair could be just around the corner and that we better start saving up again because the exterior of the house will have to be painted yet again two or three years from now.

picture of John working on demolishing the kitchen wall

Bye Bye Kitchen Wall

Now sure I could become a do it yourself kind of person and learn how to fix my own plumbing and figure out how to fix that damn light switch in the spare bedroom that doesn’t work, but you know what? I don’t want to. I’ve tried it and I don’t enjoy it and I just feel like life is too short to engage in activities and spend time learning skills that one does not feel passionate about. Once again, I’d rather go away for the weekend and see a new place or just sit down some place and read a good book.

So what’s the answer? Well, as our realtor Michael Shoffner can tell you, we’ve been kicking around the idea of selling our house for close to a year now if not more. He has been a very patient friend and resource for us as we have waffled back and forth between wanting to create change in our living situation and staying with what is familiar and comfortable. Recently we had moved into another period of contentment with our current situation when we read an article about what makes people happy. The article talked about a couple who had moved from a two bedroom apartment to one with only 400 square feet and the corresponding happiness they found from rearranging their jobs and lifestyle and living with less. We are not sure whether or not we would like to simply move in to an apartment and place the profits from our home into some type of interest bearing account, or reinvest the money in a condo or some other smaller, low maintenance type of living arrangement. There are certain financial considerations we are weighing in our head concerning the true costs of renting vs. owning.

Again I think for me it all boils down to freedom. I think we feel that not owning a home, and in particular an older home such as we now inhabit, would once again allow us to have more freedom to pursue our passions and hopefully travel move. We are both intrigued by the idea of living a more minimal lifestyle and moving into a smaller place such as an apartment or condo would be a motivator for us to examine the things we own (or what things own us!) and pare them down to those that truly give value to our lives. We also hope that through this change we could possibly lesson our monthly expenditures so as to be able to work less and play more. In the end we may once again settle into the routine of where we are but I feel certain the urge to cut lose the anchor will strike again at some point.

In the end I suppose home is not a place. Home is inside of us. It is created when we are with the ones we love and when we are doing the things that give joy and meaning to our lives. It is to live in an atmosphere that allows us the freedom to dream and create whatever possibility we can imagine. This is the home I am looking for. It is the home I felt that night in Costa Rica and it is the home I would like to find again

PS:

Thanks to Jeff and Anne and John and Suzanne for the inspiration  your travel blogs have provided showing us that we can live the retired lifestyle while we’re still young enough to enjoy it.

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Filed Under: Home Tagged With: minimalism

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